Operation: Get Rejected
I hired a coach.
And, he’s not cheap: $1000/month with a requirement of 6-months of coaching.
“Why are you telling me this, Reed?”
Because I have a BIG GOAL.
I have a really SCARY GOAL.
And, this one is HAIRIER than any I’ve set before.
“What’s a coach going to do for you?”
Things that stretch my comfort zone.
Things that are different from what I’ve been doing.
Things that force me to see myself, others, and the world differently.
Things that create clarity—and actions—around what needs to happen in order to achieve my GOAL.
And, perhaps most importantly, hiring a coach will keep me accountable to someone other than myself and, in doing so, empower me to realize that I DO have it in me.
Investing in yourself is a really powerful tool.
Get 10 NOs!
We had our first session on Monday.
My homework assignment: Get 10 NOs!
The assignment reminded me of one of my favorite Ted Talks of all time: What I Learned From 100 Days of Rejection by Jia Jiang.
Jia Jiang had made the entrepreneurial leap and 4-months into his journey he got rejected by an investor. It almost destroyed him. But, like any driven and creative person, he got creative—he created a daily challenge to seek rejection.
Day 1: Borrow $100 from a stranger
“No! Why?”
Jiang quickly said thank you and ran.
But, he realized he could have engaged—he learned.
Day 2: Can I get a burger refill?
“What’s a burger refill?”
“Well, it’s just like a drink refill but with a burger.”
“Sorry, we don’t do burger refills, man.”
Jiang could have run, but he learned from Day 1.
“Well, I love your burgers, I love your joint, and if you guys do a burger refill, I will love you guys more.”
“Ok. Well, I’ll tell my manager about it and maybe we’ll do it but, sorry, we can’t do this today.”
He stayed engaged and it was a less firm no—he continued learning.
Day 3: Ask for Olympic Symbol Donuts
Well, I’ll let you watch for yourself.
I usually spend a lot of time finding a good image—this one was exponentially longer. And, now, I’m hungry.
“You know, because of that I was in newspapers and talk shows—in everything. And I became famous. A lot of people started writing emails to me and saying, ‘What you are doing is awesome.’ But, you know, fame and notoriety did not do anything to me. What I really wanted to do was learn, and to change myself. So I turned the rest of my 100 days of rejection into this playground—into this research project. I wanted to see what I can learn.”
And, maybe that’s the point of the whole assignment: to learn.
Maybe that’s why a coach is so helpful: to create a playground for self-awareness so that we can better achieve our goals.
It’s Wednesday and I already have two NOs!
And I’ve learned in the process:
Saying NO is hard for some people—“Can you just send me the information again and I’ll think about it?”—but pushing for a yes or no answer leaves both parties so much more relieved…and makes for a great ensuing conversation.
It may be a NO right now—but not in the future: “I want to do the July session.”
In thinking about this assignment, there are huge benefits:
In getting 10 NOs, I actually win. I achieve a GOAL. It may not be the BIG, SCARY, HAIRY GOAL, but it is a GOAL—and goal-achievement is a wonderful feeling.
The more NOs I get, the more likely I am to get a YES. I have to ask to receive either.
We need to strike out to learn. The path to a GOAL is not a straight line and there are lessons in both the peaks and valleys.
I’ll leave you with this quote:
“I felt I was stuck. I was stagnant. Why is that? Where is that 14-year old who wrote that letter. It’s not because he didn’t try. It’s because every time I had a new idea—every time I wanted to try something new—I felt there was this constant battle between the 14-year old and the 6-year old. One who wanted to conquer the world and make a difference. Another was afraid of rejection. And every time, that 6-year old won.”
—Jia Jiang
And these questions:
What do you need to do to finally let that 14-year old win?
Where do you need to get a NO to help you achieve your GOAL and, in the process, learn a ton…while also increasing your likelihood of getting a YES?
What assignment would a coach give you to get you unstuck and make progress on your GOAL?
Can I help you achieve your GOAL?
YES or NO
😜😬